Wrapping up the year

I know it sounds cliche, but 2011 flew by.

February 2011

But in some ways, the early parts of it seem like a distant dream. I didn't finish with radiation until February 17th.  The first week of 2011 found me driving to Escondido each day to get zapped with radiation. Was that really me?   I didn't have much hair, but it was starting to grow back in.

I found a new normal in 2011.  Another cliche, I know.  Of course, there will always be concern about a recurrence. But for the most part, I managed to fall into a routine of shuttling kids around to school and activities, making exercise a priority, church, and continuing my family's menu of organic cooking.

Last year at this time, I resolved to lose the last 10 pounds. Well, that didn't happen. But it will happen this year. Maybe even 15. I have been on Tamoxifen for the past year, and that has caused weight gain in some women. At least I've maintained my weight since then. But I'm not going to use the medication as an excuse. Although I've been working out pretty strenuously 6 days a week, I tend to snack in the afternoons and overdo it a bit at dinner. So I'm buckling down and starting tomorrow will be back to the formula that worked for me to lose 50 pounds in 2009-10:  counting calories. I'm going to cut out all alcohol as well.  I've enjoyed the holiday fare, but its time to get down to business.  If I just control what I put in my mouth, with my exercise regimen, the excess should melt away. Right?? Right!

Another change I'm making that will help me in this area is with a personal trainer. For my birthday last October, Mom and dad got me an introductory 3 sessions with a trainer at my gym. Because the gym kind of spoiled the surprise, they gave me an additional 2 sessions. I enjoyed it so much that I went ahead and bought myself 10  more sessions, (Merry Christmas to me!)  Not knowing this, Eric bought me 3 more!  So I have 13 more sessions and will start seeing my trainer every Thursday.  She knows my fitness goals and I'll have another person to be accountable to.

2012 is going to be the year of the half marathon. I'm going to do my first one at Disneyland next month. Training for that has had me running 4 days a week for about 20-25 miles a week. I would like to do a total of three half marathons in 2012, but I need to get them done before August so I can slow it down to a walk to train for the 3 Day in November.  Yes, I signed up for the 3 Day again. While I did not enjoy the training until we got up into walking 10+ miles at a time, the event itself was an amazing and uplifting experience. I've met several other survivors in the process and the 3 Day community is incredible. Besides, if I'm going to be in the commercials urging everyone to "join us," I had better be there, hadn't I?

I'm looking forward to being more disciplined in my devotional life as well.  Our women's bible study for the Spring is going to start in early January. We are going to be studying the book of Hebrews. I've been asked to do a little bit of teaching and hitting the main points of the weekly lessons. I'm a little nervous about it, since I've never done anything like this. It is definitely going to be a motivator for me to find the time daily to study the Bible and spend some quiet time at the feet of the Lord so I can hear what He has to say.

I've also decided to write a book. I gave a talk to the women at our church last October about my journey with breast cancer. In preparing for it, I had 32 pages of outlined notes! I would like to make part of it into a book that can help other people who are facing similar circumstances. If nothing else, it will be cathartic for me!  Its not going to be a rehash of this blog, though. Stay tuned and find out.

2011 was a much better year for me than 2010, to be sure. I'm looking forward to 2012 being even better. Thank you for caring enough to read my blog and follow along with me. I appreciate you all and wish you a very Happy and Healthy new year!

My boys and I on Christmas Eve

In training

One of the things that helped me journey this cancer trip has been exercise.  During treatment, my goal was to keep exercising as much as I could-at least 5 days a week.  Check. That helped me so much get through the process.  The next goal was a couple of little races in the year. I realized this morning that in 2011, I ran three 5ks and one 10k.  Not bad for an ex-chubby girl who hated running since Alvarado middle school!

Of course, the 3 Day walk was a huge challenge in and of itself. Walking 60 miles in 3 days was no joke. Check.

My next physical goal is my first half-marathon next month.  The Disney Tinkerbell 1/2 marathon in Anaheim, California.  About a week an a half after the 3 Day ended, I started training in earnest for it.
I've got a great app from Runner's World, called "Smart Coach." You put in your goal, a recent race time, how many miles you want to do total each week and out pops a training program. It's great for a newbie like me who has no clue about how to actually train for running.

Smart Coach has me doing between 20-25 miles a week. One long run day (I'm up to 9 miles), two easier days (4 and 5 miles) and one speed work day. That entails either long repeats/intervals, or a tempo run where I run at a faster pace for 3-4 miles.  I do those on the treadmill so I can control the speed.

Today I did my second 9 miler. I did it. It wasn't too bad, except for a hill between miles 6 and 7 that I had to slow down to a walk for .10 of a mile. (I made up for it by running 9.1 before I stopped!)  I've also started running without being plugged into music, at least when I'm on the street.  I thought that would be much harder, but it wasn't. Granted, my pace isn't breaking any speed records. But I'm running the whole thing. That is my goal for this first 1/2 marathon-to run the whole 13.1, even if it's not fast. It will be a PR in any event, right?!  Today I averaged a little over 11 minute miles.

As I ran I thought about other physical goals for the year.  I've been working with a personal trainer for the last month at the gym. The sessions were a birthday gift from my parents. That has been a lot of fun, and something I'm going to continue.  She has  taken me into the "big boy" weight training room to show me how to do some new things. As I told my trainer, my goal right now is just to maintain my weight, and keep my running training on track. Come January, I'm going to buckle down and lose the last 10 pounds that I've been carrying around.  I feel good where I am, but with my short height, I could go 10-15 pounds lower from where I am. I'd like to see what that looks and feels like. But to try and start that  during the holidays is unrealistic. So 2012 it is.  With all the exercise, it should just take some discipline on the eating/drinking side for a month or two to get it off.

And what about events? I've already signed up for the 2012 3 Day walk in November, so that will take 13-16 weeks of training in the fall.  I decided this morning that, God willing, I'd like to do three 1/2 marathons this year. Tinkerbell in January is already set. I've found the San Diego Rock & Roll 1/2 marathon in early June. I need to find one more before mid-August in order to get 3 in before I have to slow it down to a walk.

I still can't believe this is me. As I was running today, I saw my shadow and couldn't believe it. I was over 5 miles into it, and felt great. It's amazing what you can do if you stick to it.  Persistence, perseverance and don't give up. Change will happen. Praise and thanksgiving to God for giving me the strength and ability to do it.

Now if God will keep the cancer from coming back, everything will be great.

Bring in the new

Happy New Year to everyone out there.  I hope 2011  brings everyone health, peace and a greater knowledge and relationship of our Lord.

I had started to write about how I hoped 2011 would be better for me than 2010.  But then I started to think about the good things that came about in 2010:

• A new niece (Kate) and a new nephew (Caleb).  What a blessing babies are! It is great to be an Aunt twice over in one year.
• The kids continued to do well in school.  Olivier made the transition to middle school well.  That was a big change for all of us, but it went well.
• Eric had a great year in his job.  In this economy, that is saying something! His superiors like him, and like what he is doing for the company. 
• I got into the best physical shape of my life in the first half of the year.  I've fought the second half to try and keep it, lol. 
• The kids are healthy. 

Yeah, 2010 did have its BIG challenge--breast cancer.  The reason we are here. I wouldn't add that to the list of blessings right now. Perhaps at some point in the future, I will be able to see the good in it.  Right now, I'm in the thick of the fight. 

I never have been one to make New Year's Resolutions.  If I decide I'm going to do something, I do it, regardless of the time of the year. But this year, I can't help but feel like its good to make some goals for myself.   Physical, mental and spiritual goals.  So here they are:

• I want to lose another 15 pounds. I'm going to wait until after my radiation to really get serious about this.  But I know how to do it-I lost 50 pounds last year.  I was about 10 away from my goal when I was diagnosed.  Suddenly, losing weight didn't seem as important when I had cancer to think about. Since diagnosis, I've put about 5 back on-and that is on top of losing all of my breast tissue.  After radiation ends in February, its going to be back to counting calories until I reach my original weight loss goal from 2009.  
• I would like to get through radiation without a flare up of lymphedema.  This is definitely out of my control.  But I can do what I can do to help: twice daily manual drainage; keeping up with exercise, even if radiation makes me tired; avoiding salt; bandaging; and wearing my compression sleeve.  If after all of that I swell up, then so be it.  But I will have done all I could do. 
• On the spiritual side, I want to get back into a disciplined daily Bible reading program.  I'll admit that I've let that slide over the past year.  Its strange because in some ways, my walk has deepened nonetheless.  But I miss God's Word, and I know that it feeds my spirit.  A few years ago, I dove into reading both Old and New Testaments in one year.  It was a push, and I didn't have a 2 year old at the time.  I found a reading schedule on Blue Letter Bible that will get you through both in 2 years.  It alternates one day of Old Testament with one day of New.  Today's reading was only 3 chapters of Genesis. I can do this.  I NEED to do this, and I will.  I also want to keep up with the Women's Bible Study at church that starts later this month.
• I'd like to do the Susan G. Komen 3 Day walk in November. 60 miles in 3 days.  I'll focus on that more after radiation. I need to make sure I can get through that without my arm swelling up like a balloon.  I don't want to let lymphedema take me out of that.  First things first. 

I may come up with more goals as the year goes on.  For me right now, I think simplicity will be best.  It would be easy to make a big laundry list of things "to do" and then easily forget.  So there it is.  

Out with the old, bring in the new!